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Self-esteem developed in childhood can last a lifetime.
It depends on what you say is “wrong.” First of all, positive reinforcement is when someone says “well done” or “nice job” or “I liked what you did”. Positive reinforcement gives everyone, adult or child, a good feeling, increases self-confidence, and helps shape the child's self-esteem. When a child grows up in a highly critical home environment, this criticism causes damage to the self-esteem of the majority of children. And this is for their lives. This boost to their self-esteem will stay with them throughout their lives, or until the time comes to buy self-help books or see a psychologist. Despite all this, it is extremely difficult to create an image as good as being raised in a positive atmosphere where they will feel appreciated. If people don't feel appreciated, they feel compelled to hide their personality, identity, or way of interacting. Research shows that when people don't feel good enough, they will underachieve because they feel that way.
A very small portion of children progress despite everything because of the power within them that somehow pushes them forward. But this is an extremely rare condition. It is important for a young child to be liked. In fact, being liked is important for all of us. If you, as an adult, are walking around the house singing and someone says to you, “Hey, be quiet!” Have you ever heard your own voice?” If you say, you probably won't sing again because someone told you you did something badly and they didn't like it. Or, on the contrary; If someone accompanies you while you are singing at home and says, "You have such a beautiful voice," you will think to yourself, "Yes, I am doing this really well."
Positive reinforcement when the child is young
Show a child that you like it and say “Cool!” When you say, your child understands from the tone of your voice that you approve of him/her. Whether it is a week old, a month old, or ten years old, a child responds to appreciation.
Dr Glenn Doman from the Institute for Achieving Human Potential (IHAP) has found that reinforcement has a huge impact on children. Families from all over the world come to IAHP for its pioneering work in child brain development and for its programs helping brain-injured children. One of the earliest developmental assessment tasks implemented by the IAHP involved having the child hold an overhead bar. Some families lift their child up and the child can hold the stick in less than a second. Families were saying “Honey…dear”. This statement is like, “We begged, borrowed, and stole to get on this show, is that the best you can do?” means. In contrast, families who hold their children up to the same bar say, “Well done! You did this really well!” says. This phrase means “You did that well!” Who would have believed that a brain-damaged child could hold it this long, we love you!” means. The child memorizes this information and says to himself, “Okay, very good, I will do this again!” he thinks. The results are tremendous.
Redirecting Power
Positive reinforcement is normally a natural response that parents give to their children, but it is actually a technique that parents and teachers use to encourage good behavior in children, regardless of age, or as a movement that directs children's attention in the direction you want them to focus. So, what do we do when a child does something wrong? For example, in one of our classes, wrong has two meanings. It could mean that a wrong child is scaring another child. This is tyranny and violence. and we don't say "Well done", we say "This is not the right behavior and we will not accept you doing this again", then we show the right way and explain the right behavior. Then he asked the child, “Do you understand?” we ask, the child says “Yes” and then says “Well done!” We respond and encourage positive behavior. This is the moment when there is appreciation for the correct behavior for which you offer positive reinforcement. Another example of the same principle: the child is shown a picture of a mouse, but the child calls it "cat". The teacher should say, “It's a mouse.” Then the child responds with “mouse” and the teacher says “Yes, it is a mouse!” Well done." should say. If the child accidentally forgets the answer, you encourage the correct answer and offer positive reinforcement. Wrong reaction, inappropriate behavior or wrong answer, we show them the right way. We get along with them, tell them well done when they react, and frequently remind them not to stray from the right path.
Children hear the positive first
A few years ago I was sitting with a man and he told me about his interaction with a 2-year-old. There was an open fire and he told the boy not to touch it. So the first thing the boy did was put his hand into the fire. He asked me why. I said that the children did not hear the word “don't” but instead heard the word “touch”. They hear the negative instead of the positive. So, instead of telling him not to touch him, tell him “stay away.”
All these years of teaching English have shown us the effectiveness of the Helen Doron English methodology. We built self-esteem through our own teaching method. Positive reinforcement is vital. We train our teachers to do this. Much teacher training emphasizes why it is important to provide this type of reinforcement and teaches teachers how to do it effectively in the classroom. Teachers learn to create an environment and an expectation that will contribute to the success of the methodology.
We train our teachers with positive reinforcement. Sometimes teachers may not be able to teach with this methodology, positive reinforcement may not be in their basic nature, or they may become stuck in another way of teaching that includes criticism that they cannot transition to. Additionally, I have seen teachers, franchisees, and master franchisors say that their family dynamics changed when they learned the positive reinforcement philosophy themselves. Positive reinforcement changes dysfunctional behaviors. Instead of criticizing each other, families are supportive, and the child, siblings, and family as a whole respond well. People take this philosophy from the classroom and apply it to their own lives, improving the quality of life for their families. Today, modern psychology focuses on the positive instead of the negative. This is positive reinforcement, positive thinking in the current trending behavior. I remember raising my own children. Even when we went on long trips by plane with all three of us, we never reenacted the scenes you sometimes see in other places, we never shouted or screamed. We somehow worked effectively together, and I'm sure it was positive reinforcement that contributed to this dynamic. Children felt accepted, felt the family relationship. They knew what was expected of them. Sometimes children don't know what is expected of them, they always hear "No". This is something families need to be aware of.
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